Birthday Bashing
(August 2006 issue)
My tormenter in grade school was an androgynous eight-year-old tub of lard who feeds on sloppy peanut butter sandwiches in between mathematical equations. She would loudly express her repulsion towards me by calling me a midget in the middle of a game of hopscotch at dismissal, and, on every occasion, when she felt like performing her obligatory terroristic attacks against my humanity.
I recently had the direful chance of meeting her almost a decade after that one afternoon she tried to shove my head in a flowerpot. She is now, beyond my imagination, a loving mother of two, and a type of a kindly woman who would cry over a detergent soap commercial.
I then resolved that people, like things tangible, change over years of parental chastening and secondary school classes on values and formation.
However, in the concept of dualism, it is stated that there are two basic opposing principles, such as good and evil, both of which can not exist without the other.
In this light, do I say that while there are reformed jerks, there are, of course, perpetual browbeaters.
What is utterly disturbing is when such brutes mature into middle-aged bullies, using their seat of authority to concoct misfortunes against people who don’t take their fancy.
Case in point: I published a poster in the eve of my birthday inviting my co-student journalists to free lunch. The poster shows a mock cartoon of myself with child-drawn horns sticking out of my hair. The horns were implications of an inside joke in the press corps, following the knowledge that a chief like myself is the Darth Vader of a normal workplace.
I was having a wonderful afternoon with my cohorts amidst an Everest of paper work when a DLS-CSB Queen Bee paid an unannounced visit to the office bearing the poster in question. After exchanging hellos to my boss, she then proceeded to questioning me regarding the birthday poster she found posted on the office door. I explained that the girl-child on the poster was a cartoon version of me and that the horns sticking out of the cartoon’s head has been an inside joke among my co-student journalists in the press corps.
“You’d post this in a Catholic institution?” was the only response I received followed by “This should call for a disciplinary action.”
I was overwhelmed beyond words like how I was bowled over watching Mariah Carey’s Glitter on big screen with my head screaming “Justice!” for the P200 I just blew.
The Queen Bee left with a caustic barb so terrifying it left my pancreas melting out of my derriere: “This is not the end of it.”
In this cause did I decide to come up with possibly morally insulting sights within the Catholic institution that is the De La Salle-College of Saint Benilde:
The brilliant student dancers of the College posing in their promotional posters with their privates bandaged-up in canvas.
The photoshopped posters of one professor doing a flimsy impersonation of the unhallowed, hellborn Lestat in MMA mini exhibitions along the Mutien fourth floor hallway.
Students doning shirts bearing logos of bands with names such as Porno for Pyros and The Cult clearly advocating sacrilege and immorality.
My homosexual brethrens playing dress up with Hilton sisters-inspired fineries.
Due to my so-called crusty demeanor portrayed in this article piece, I am expecting a stern scolding from the Queen Bee and perhaps another meeting with one more overgrown DLS-CSB bully popular for his menacing tactics provided a disciplinary action shall be filed against my big bad mouth.
Just in case they kick my sinister self out of this Catholic institution, here’s a word of advice for your benefit: Beware of middle-aged bullies.
***
I hate politics.
Now, if that doesn’t pose enough “oomph” because “hate” is now a so-so terminology used to define one’s disgust over little things like spinach or that hotel heiress with an infamous home video, then allow me to rephrase myself: I scorn politics.
Now that figures.
At the outset, politics defies the third most important of the moral imperatives stated in the Decalogue, likewise known as The Ten Commandments being the fifth precept: Thou shall not murder.
Saddam Hussein, Iraqi president from 1979 until the American invasion of Iraq in 2003, is standing trial under the interim Iraqi government for war crimes and genocide. Case in point: the Halabja poison gas attack that the Iraqi government forces used to exterminate a multitude of civilians from the Kurdish town of Halabja. An estimated number of casualties range from several hundred to 7,000 people. The poison, a mixture of mustard gas and nerve agents, moreover, maimed, disfigured and gravely debilitated 10,000 more Kurds. The assault occurred in concurrence with the 1988 al-Anfal campaign, a crusade intended to defeat the Kurdish Peshmerga rebel forces.
In the Philippines, political killings are becoming the common cold of politically motivated crimes.
In Arroyo’s administration alone, there have been some 117 extra judicial political executions.
Regrettably, already on its third year, the Philippines still maintains its status as the second most dangerous country for journalists.
Whatever happened to democracy?
But perhaps, democracy is but a dream; something comparable to Stephen Hawking’s and WJ van Stockum’s time machine pie in the sky.
(August 2006 issue)
My tormenter in grade school was an androgynous eight-year-old tub of lard who feeds on sloppy peanut butter sandwiches in between mathematical equations. She would loudly express her repulsion towards me by calling me a midget in the middle of a game of hopscotch at dismissal, and, on every occasion, when she felt like performing her obligatory terroristic attacks against my humanity.
I recently had the direful chance of meeting her almost a decade after that one afternoon she tried to shove my head in a flowerpot. She is now, beyond my imagination, a loving mother of two, and a type of a kindly woman who would cry over a detergent soap commercial.
I then resolved that people, like things tangible, change over years of parental chastening and secondary school classes on values and formation.
However, in the concept of dualism, it is stated that there are two basic opposing principles, such as good and evil, both of which can not exist without the other.
In this light, do I say that while there are reformed jerks, there are, of course, perpetual browbeaters.
What is utterly disturbing is when such brutes mature into middle-aged bullies, using their seat of authority to concoct misfortunes against people who don’t take their fancy.
Case in point: I published a poster in the eve of my birthday inviting my co-student journalists to free lunch. The poster shows a mock cartoon of myself with child-drawn horns sticking out of my hair. The horns were implications of an inside joke in the press corps, following the knowledge that a chief like myself is the Darth Vader of a normal workplace.
I was having a wonderful afternoon with my cohorts amidst an Everest of paper work when a DLS-CSB Queen Bee paid an unannounced visit to the office bearing the poster in question. After exchanging hellos to my boss, she then proceeded to questioning me regarding the birthday poster she found posted on the office door. I explained that the girl-child on the poster was a cartoon version of me and that the horns sticking out of the cartoon’s head has been an inside joke among my co-student journalists in the press corps.
“You’d post this in a Catholic institution?” was the only response I received followed by “This should call for a disciplinary action.”
I was overwhelmed beyond words like how I was bowled over watching Mariah Carey’s Glitter on big screen with my head screaming “Justice!” for the P200 I just blew.
The Queen Bee left with a caustic barb so terrifying it left my pancreas melting out of my derriere: “This is not the end of it.”
In this cause did I decide to come up with possibly morally insulting sights within the Catholic institution that is the De La Salle-College of Saint Benilde:
The brilliant student dancers of the College posing in their promotional posters with their privates bandaged-up in canvas.
The photoshopped posters of one professor doing a flimsy impersonation of the unhallowed, hellborn Lestat in MMA mini exhibitions along the Mutien fourth floor hallway.
Students doning shirts bearing logos of bands with names such as Porno for Pyros and The Cult clearly advocating sacrilege and immorality.
My homosexual brethrens playing dress up with Hilton sisters-inspired fineries.
Due to my so-called crusty demeanor portrayed in this article piece, I am expecting a stern scolding from the Queen Bee and perhaps another meeting with one more overgrown DLS-CSB bully popular for his menacing tactics provided a disciplinary action shall be filed against my big bad mouth.
Just in case they kick my sinister self out of this Catholic institution, here’s a word of advice for your benefit: Beware of middle-aged bullies.
***
I hate politics.
Now, if that doesn’t pose enough “oomph” because “hate” is now a so-so terminology used to define one’s disgust over little things like spinach or that hotel heiress with an infamous home video, then allow me to rephrase myself: I scorn politics.
Now that figures.
At the outset, politics defies the third most important of the moral imperatives stated in the Decalogue, likewise known as The Ten Commandments being the fifth precept: Thou shall not murder.
Saddam Hussein, Iraqi president from 1979 until the American invasion of Iraq in 2003, is standing trial under the interim Iraqi government for war crimes and genocide. Case in point: the Halabja poison gas attack that the Iraqi government forces used to exterminate a multitude of civilians from the Kurdish town of Halabja. An estimated number of casualties range from several hundred to 7,000 people. The poison, a mixture of mustard gas and nerve agents, moreover, maimed, disfigured and gravely debilitated 10,000 more Kurds. The assault occurred in concurrence with the 1988 al-Anfal campaign, a crusade intended to defeat the Kurdish Peshmerga rebel forces.
In the Philippines, political killings are becoming the common cold of politically motivated crimes.
In Arroyo’s administration alone, there have been some 117 extra judicial political executions.
Regrettably, already on its third year, the Philippines still maintains its status as the second most dangerous country for journalists.
Whatever happened to democracy?
But perhaps, democracy is but a dream; something comparable to Stephen Hawking’s and WJ van Stockum’s time machine pie in the sky.
posted by Louella | 4:24 AM
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